Ah the classic young vs old debate….who would you rather?! Though we should assess our date based on his attributes as an individual, there are some consistent things that older and younger guys do when it comes to dating. I know women who would never consider dating a younger guy, but I also know women who hate dating older guys for some very specific reasons. Both younger guys and older guys have positives and negatives when it comes to dating them. For the sake of this article, older means ‘chronologically older than you’ and younger means ‘chronologically younger than you. Let’s also assume that “younger” means millennial (ages 18-33 born from 1981 to 1996). Now that we’re on the same page, here are some of the pros of dating younger guys vs older guys.
1. Younger guys are less “in their heads”.
Older guys can get caught in the trap of letting old flames cloud their judgment. A bad breakup with an ex can cause some older guys to hold on to the past and unconsciously (and sometimes consciously) bring that baggage into new relationships. Younger guys (possibly because of less relationship-based experiences) can be more positive and baggage-free on dates and in new relationships.
2. Younger guys are up for anything!
If there’s a music festival in town… they’re there! Wanna take a spontaneous road trip….they just need to know what days to take off of work. A sporting event or art installation…they’re into it! While everyone enjoys a night in from time to time, younger guys are totally into experiential dates where activities and adventures are part of the plan. The question is, “Will YOU be able to keep up?” If you crave new stimulating experiences, you want to get out of the house, and you want to date someone with a ton of energy, dating younger could be a great fit!
3. Younger guys will text you (instead of calling).
He’ll probably text you rather than call you. Especially if he’s a millennial, he probably grew up with a cell phone and in that world, texting was not a negative thing. He also grew up in a time where communication styles were just beginning to become more fast-paced and more virtual. For a younger guy, a text is an easy way to say, “Hi! I’m thinking about you!” He may avoid calling you because as a young single guy told me once, “why would I call her if I could see her in person?” He’d rather text you or see you, not necessarily call you.
4. Younger guys care less about ‘what society says.
This current generation of younger guys (millennials) are less confined by what society says they should do and who they should date. They are less intimidated by a woman who has certain alpha qualities, they’re more curious about non-traditional relationship styles, and they’re not as concerned with stereotypical gender roles. A lot of millennials grew up with mothers who worked full time and possibly ran a household. These young guys grew up with strong female influences and in turn enjoy (and aren’t scared off by) dating a strong woman. Plus it might just be a turn on for a young guy to date an older woman who has had a variety of relationships and life experiences and who isn’t afraid to ask for and go after what she wants!
5. Younger guys are ‘ready’ at a moment’s notice.
The words stamina and fun come to mind! Some younger guys may still be figuring out how to please a woman, but it doesn’t mean that they won’t make a big effort to give it a go. If you can find a younger guy that has a mix of stamina and willingness to learn what you like, you’ve found yourself a keeper in the bedroom! Because of his excitement, the seduction process might be quick at times, but younger guys are highly enthusiastic behind closed doors, which makes for fun sexy times!
1. Older guys are more established in their careers and have more disposable income.
Generally more established in their careers, older guys are usually less stressed with work stuff, more confident about what they have to offer, and more open to spending money socially. He may have more disposable income which means that he will probably be able to take you out to a nice dinner or even a surprise vacay without worrying about how much it’s going to cost.
2. Older guys take the lead on dates.
When he asks you out, and yes he’s almost always going to ask YOU out, he’s got a plan for your date. He may even present you with a few date night options that he’ll ask you to choose from. There’s usually not a question of ‘who’s paying for dinner’….he’s got it covered and may even consider it an insult if you offered to pay for your half. There’s a traditional charm and chivalrous touch that he adds to dates because he was raised in a different time.
3. Older guys will call you (instead of texting).
He’ll probably call you rather than text you. Again, he’s got old school charm and wants to hear your voice. He doesn’t mind stepping out of a meeting to call and see how your day is going. In fact, he might avoid texting you or find it annoying if you text him frequently because he thinks it’s too impersonal. He’d rather be face-to-face or voice-to-voice.
4. Older guys know what they want and are more likely to be looking for a serious relationship.
Older guys most likely know what they want (and don’t want) in a relationship. They’ve most likely been in a serious relationship before and may have even been married. Some women think that is a good quality based on the idea that he’s learned what to do (and not to do) in a relationship generally-speaking because he’s had ‘practice’ in his prior relationships. Older guys have a certain level of maturity because they’ve been around the block in the dating world.
5. Older guys have a wealth of sexual knowledge.
The chemistry has to be right, but most older guys have learned what works (and doesn’t work in the bedroom. They’ve taken the time to find out how to please their women, what their woman likes, and take their time to enjoy the process of seduction. A lot of older men, and women, say that they older they get, the better their sex lives become.
Ultimately age shouldn’t be the only deciding factor when getting to know and dating someone new. Older guys aren’t better than younger guys and younger guys aren’t better than older guys. No one thing works for every single person in the dating game! It’s always best to follow your heart and go with what best suits you. Happy dating!
Hugs and love,
Erin Tillman ‘The Dating Advice Girl’