Top 10 Dating Tips for Star Wars Fans by @DontKillYourDat

dating tips for Star Wars fans
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Star Wars FansI have dated a Jedi. Seriously.  And that makes me a good candidate for helping Star Wars fans.

Yep, I have dated the lovely Nalini Krishan, who played Barriss Offee in Attack of the Clones and Revenge of the Sith.  She is still a dear friend of mine.  That just goes to show that you can stay in touch with people you have dated.  But that’s another article.  So here are…

Top 10 dating tips for Star Wars fans

1. Be smoooove like Billy Dee WilliamsLando Calrissian, for good or bad, he was always cool, calm, and sexy.  Han may have the rough edged bad boy thing down, but I guarantee, if he wasn’t around, Princess Leia would have popped open more than just a cold can of Colt 45 with that rascally vagabond.

2. Don’t date your siblingSeriously, in all the universe, Luke had to kiss HER?!?  Ew, ew, and double EEEWWWW!  Thanks to our earthbound yet awesome “Star Wars-ian” internet, we can do a little digging before we get too hot and heavy.  Don’t be afraid to Google your intended and sidestep any familial tongue wrestling.

3. Ewok up your jointLadies love soft cuddly plushy things. If your bachelor pad is nothing but empty beer cans and sticky adult themed comic books, you are not setting forth an inviting smuggler’s den. Add some tasteful pillows, a soft blanket or two, and even a life sized Chewbacca can fill the void. You may be a hard man, but don’t be afraid to show her your softer side.

4. Never name your junk, “Darth”-anythingSidius, Maul, Vader, nothing.  All that will do is scare your intended away, for fear of contracting a galactic STD, like Sarlaac-a-gina, Dagohbahlls, or Womp Rat Crotch.

5. Don’t be like the prequelsIf you are big on flashy effects, but short on heart and substance, you have work to do on yourself.  If you don’t have JJ Abrams to help you reboot, start looking inward and begin your inner Jedi training to become a better person.  Or in the end, you will just be a lonely Jar Jar Binks singing “Meesa Horny” as you trip over a wine cork, fall off a balcony, and somehow cut power to half the city.  Dumbass.

6. Get good with both handsIf Star Wars has taught us anything, it is to be prepared (and that Stormtroopers can’t hit shit). If you are good with your hands, you will be in a good place in the unlikely event of a light saber malfunction. Even if your dickhead daddy cuts off one, you can still take care of business.

7. Play dress up.  If your significant other is into it, there’s no reason you can’t enjoy a little Cosplay in the bedroom.  Be sure to clear it with your date beforehand, otherwise, when you both show up as sexy slave Leia.  Awkward.

8. Your Jedi mind trick, will not workNo matter how much you believe in the force, you will not make your date do anything with the power of your mind.  Once you train, learn some sexy skills, and believe in yourself, you can have Jedi level confidence.  Then, you will not need mind tricks at all.

9. Han shot first! But, fellas, you shouldn’t!  Repeat this mantra, “Ladies come first,” and live by this code.  Do it in all facets of life and it will increase your attractiveness by leaps and bounds.  If you do; you will be rewarded just like the “good bad boy” you, and Han, are.

10. Do or do not, there is no try.  If Yoda can be a badass Jedi master at all of his 2-foot nothin, then what is keeping you from taking a shot at love?  If anything is going to happen in life, you must make it so.  Summon your inner Jedi, get out there and take a shot.  The only true failure is the failure to never attempt.

 

 

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The “Dating Sage,” Spike Spencer, is an internationally known public speaker, actor, voice over talent, and a Foodie of the first magnitude. He is also a self-published author, with thousands of books sold. For the past 6 years, Spike has been speaking in his humorous “Don’t Kill Your Date (and Other Cooking Tips)” panel at conventions around the world. Thousands have enjoyed his talks about dating, relationships, and “being a man,” using cooking, adventure, and self improvement as his mediums. At some of these appearances, Spike actually cooks for the crowd. Spike is currently in production on the TV pilot of his "Don't Kill Your Date (and Other Cooking Tips)" cooking/dating talk show, and writing the companion book, of the same title. The DKYD concept derives from a very real desire to help guys become better MEN, spurred by Spike’s own personal story of divorce tragedy, bankruptcy, love lost, and re-emergence into the dating world. Through Spike’s “field research” - dating triumphs and tragedies, crazy experiences, PUA studies, and learning to really listen to women and build a strong successful relationship- Spike is the straight guy women can count on to help them translate their needs to their men. Spike uses cooking, a very real and popular way to expand a man’s arsenal of desirable traits, to help men attract the woman of their dreams, just like Spike has done!

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