Improve Your Sexual Technique, Become Orgasmic
This article is about how to develop the best sexual technique, not to teach you random moves to try. The fact is that there is no such thing as universally great technique that can be pre-planned.
The best sexual technique naturally arises in the moment when you’re orgasmically on.
The key to improve your sexual technique is not memorizing moves, but from doing the work to be in orgasm–a state of heightened sensation. Once in that state, the best sex moves will come to you intuitively.
Here are eight ways to change your sex game so that every technique you do is a masterful play.
1. Notice the Sensation that is
Intuition is a subset of feeling. Orgasm starts with what’s already there. Notice the sensations in your body. Focus on the points of contact between you and your partner, whether via genitals or random skin. Every body part can be orgasmic if you bring awareness to it.
2. Slooooow Down
If you move too fast you don’t give the feeling of orgasm to catch up. There’s nowhere to get to and nothing you have to do. Slow down enough so that the sensation can lead you.
3. Follow What Feels Good To You
Following sensation means approaching physical touch with curiosity. What feels good to you? Every masterful sexual technique was created from people trying different things that felt good.
4. Ask For Adjustments
The simplest way to improve your sexual technique is to ask your partner. Don’t let your ego get in the way of actually pleasing your partner.
5. Feel into Your Partner
When we learn to drive, we really develop the sense to feel into a metal body so that we can move it through space as an extension of our body. Maybe you haven’t thought of if that way, but notice how effortlessly you can drive without thinking. In sex you both move two bodies in space. Extend your physical awareness to your partner. You’ll be surprised at how intuitively you’ll be able to move.
6. Pay Attention to your Intention
Sex is more than just physically rubbing body parts. It’s an exchange of energy. If you’re thinking about bills, other people, or what you’re going to do afterwards, in some way you partner can feel it. Plain old missionary sex can be some of the most electrifying if both partners are fully present.
7. Make Heightening Sensation Your Only Goal
If you are shooting for a goal (climax, a certain duration, a specific response) you will certainly fail to improve your sexual technique. The best orgasmic outcomes arise naturally from high sensation. Simply do the things that allow you and you partner to feel more.
8. Act Immediately on Intuition
Orgasmic sex is a spontaneous and dynamic ocean. The ultimate secret to improve your sexual technique is to be able to ride the wave. Like a surfer, if you hesitate, you’ll get caught under it and never be able to be carried by the flow. The way to get on is to act immediately whenever something feels good. When you can get “on board” of the feeling, the best sexual technique will flow out of you.