Men Don’t Text, Men Call! by @DontKillYourDat

Men Don't Text
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Ain’t technology grand? There is more computing power in an iPod than in all the tech that got us to the moon and back. We can connect instantly with anyone almost any place on the planet. We have virtually unlimited access to all of the information known to mankind. We know more about the lives of our friends than ever before. Digital communication Men Don't Texthas become incredibly easy, and that is a big problem. It has become so easy that we are forgetting the lost art of actually talking to one another.

We text because it’s simple, quick, and convenient. I do it all the time. But far too many of us are texting when we should be talking. We even have shorthand that borders on the ridiculous ROTFLMFAO! There is nothing wrong with texting a quick message to a friend, just not while you are driving, of course. But when you start texting novel sized chunks of data instead of taking a few seconds to actually speak to someone, technology has defeated you and lost it’s purpose. And what’s even worse, as a man, with every “LOL” you are losing your testosterone, bit by bit. Why? Because…

Men Don’t Text, Men Call.

Why am I being so hard on technology? I’m not. I love technology. I think it’s amazing. I use it everyday. What do you think I am typing on right now? No, I am taking issue with all the fellas out there who use texting in lieu of actually talking to a woman. If you are one of these guys, you are shooting yourself in the foot. And you are missing out on great opportunities to meet amazing women who are looking for a man with whom they can connect on a deeper level. A connection that will not come from looking at an iPhone screen and seeing your smiley face icon.

It’s hard enough to convey feelings and intentions in person, but when you take away the face to face contact you lose so much. Most of our communication is physical and non verbal, how we carry ourselves, sub-text, etc. Especially as men, this is our most powerful tool; how we convey confidence. The further away from this physical communication we go, the less power we have in how our messages are being conveyed. Face to face is hard enough, the phone is one step below that, but it really goes south from there. We’ve all had somebody misinterpret an email or two and had to do a mea culpa. And that’s with a thoroughly thought out, edited for context, message that we have read and re-read just to be sure we convey what we wish. And still we have no control over how it is received.

So much is lost in digital communication.

Don’t take away the second most powerful weapon in your arsenal, your voice. I use my voice to make a living and I know the subtleties involved in conveying messages that way. It is not as good as talking in person, but it is way better than text alone. Especially in the beginning of a relationship. Your initial contact sets the stage for how things will go bookstore150later. If you are strong and solid in your communication, you will present yourself as a confident and strong MAN. If you are timid and there is trepidation in your communication, you will come across as less. And that is bad.

That’s why you got her phone number in the first place! Now you have the opportunity to wow and woo her with your awesome powers of communication. You can make her laugh and know that you did so immediately. You do not have to wait for her to text back her smiley icon or “LMAO.” You have the opportunity to build upon that right away and strengthen your position. The lag time in communication is a killer. When you actually speak to her, you have solved that particular problem and that just makes the whole communication thing easier on you.

How many times have you read that it is imperative to take your online dating to the phone or in person as quickly as possible? Probably many times, and that is because the faster you get to your next stage of communication, the stronger your chances of success. So get off the computer screen and/or iPhone as fast as possible and start to use your most powerful tools of voice and face-to-face communication. Your chances of having a real relationship with a woman who thinks you are a man will increase immensely. Here’s to your success.

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The “Dating Sage,” Spike Spencer, is an internationally known public speaker, actor, voice over talent, and a Foodie of the first magnitude. He is also a self-published author, with thousands of books sold. For the past 6 years, Spike has been speaking in his humorous “Don’t Kill Your Date (and Other Cooking Tips)” panel at conventions around the world. Thousands have enjoyed his talks about dating, relationships, and “being a man,” using cooking, adventure, and self improvement as his mediums. At some of these appearances, Spike actually cooks for the crowd. Spike is currently in production on the TV pilot of his "Don't Kill Your Date (and Other Cooking Tips)" cooking/dating talk show, and writing the companion book, of the same title. The DKYD concept derives from a very real desire to help guys become better MEN, spurred by Spike’s own personal story of divorce tragedy, bankruptcy, love lost, and re-emergence into the dating world. Through Spike’s “field research” - dating triumphs and tragedies, crazy experiences, PUA studies, and learning to really listen to women and build a strong successful relationship- Spike is the straight guy women can count on to help them translate their needs to their men. Spike uses cooking, a very real and popular way to expand a man’s arsenal of desirable traits, to help men attract the woman of their dreams, just like Spike has done!

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