Dating is Hard Work by @LilliesandLove

dating is hard work
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You’re reading this on a website for singles so I’m taking a guess that you’re dipping your toes in the pool and having a bash at getting Cupid’s arrows to plant firmly onto you, so as we’re amongst friends, I can speak freely and be really honest with you.

Dating is hard work.Dating is Hard Work

Yep, nobody ever wants to say it, everybody always want to tell you to “take it as it comes” and “go with the flow” because “the right person will come along when you least expect it” but, realistically, when you’re working your way through the world of dating, you’ve heard those clichés before, and the words echo emptily around inside your head as you give your much-practiced and much-used “Yes, I know” smile.

I realised what hard work dating is after I found myself suddenly propelled back into singledom after a 7-year relationship went sour. We’d met when I was 18 and split up when I was 25 so I’d missed out on all those crucial years of flirting and meeting men; I was completely lost and totally confused.

As I’d been out (un)happily shacked up for so long, I didn’t really know what I was letting myself in for when I got back on the dating scene but once I was officially ‘back in the game’ I was left wondering…

Why hasn’t somebody written a rule book?

If there were some sort of guidelines we could all adhere to I’m sure things would be much clearer and if there was a manual available then I definitely think the whole process would be a lot less scary.

I was constantly wondering whether I was texting too much, texting too little, should I be inviting him out, should he be inviting me out, should I hold his hand/kiss him/sleep with him and the worst one… were we just “seeing each other” or was he my “boyfriend”.

I was often left hankering for my days as a 7 year old when I simply walked up to the boy I liked in the playground and asked, “Would you be my boyfriend?”

To quote another cliché, I have to say that once I’d stopped overthinking things and decided to just take things as I found them, I’m pleased to say that I found what I hope is the right man for me and, yes – no word of a lie – I did text him and ask “Would you be my boyfriend?”

Thankfully, he said yes, that could have been embarrassing…

Read more from Lillies and Love HERE.


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20-something (pushing 30!) lifestyle blogger from Essex writing about anything and everything that life brings. A severe case of champagne taste and lemonade pockets. I work 9-5 and dream 24/7.

1 Comment

  • June 18, 2013


    It would be so much easier if someone wrote a rule book…in fact I think a few of our team have hehe