Let’s face the facts here, people. Sometimes, dating sucks.
That’s the truth. You have to learn to know when to say when. This is going to save you lots of time, trouble and hopefully keep men from thinking you’re crazy. Right now, I’m taking a dating hiatus. It’s because I could tell that I was getting a little crazy, and I just need to take a step back.
How You Know When To Say When
Sometimes, it’s hard. You get in the dating groove, you’re racking up dates left and right, then men are just a’flockin. You’re having fun, going out, and enjoying your time with these people. Then, you start worrying, and wondering, and stressing, and just being downright insane. This is when you have to realize what’s happening.
Here are some quick ways for you recognize when it’s time to take a breather:
- If you start talking about a guy more than you actually spend time with him.
- You get this weird tight feeling in your chest when you’re thinking about dating.
- When you start to feel bad about yourself because “you’re not getting dates”.
- You start dwelling on past relationships.
- Contacting exes that you know aren’t good for you.
- You base your self-worth on your current dating life.
Yes… it’s easy to do. It’s not unheard of, and there’s nothing wrong with it. We all do it. You just get a little weird. I know I personally am like, “why on earth am I doing this? Why am I calling/texting him? I don’t even like this person?!” But I just want the attention or something… I really can’t tell you what it is. But, what I can tell you, is when I get those “symptoms” that I listed above, I have to take a quick break.
Step Back, Take a Breath and…
Take some me time! Focus on you. Let’s be honest here, if you are still dating around, as in dating multiple men, it’s unlikely that any one of those guys are your future hubs. That means taking a break from them is likely not going to make major waves in the remainder of your dating life. Nothing wrong with dating guys you’re not going to marry. Hell, life is usually a lot more fun that way, but just take a hiatus. This hiatus means no dates. You don’t have to ignore guys if they talk to you, but just don’t stress over it. Don’t initiate conversations. Don’t go out and try to meet men. Have a girls night; drink some wine, watch a chick flick, get a mani/pedi and even eat a pint of ice cream if you want. I know, it’s totally cliche, but it works.
Get back to that, “oh hell yes, this dating thing is awesome” feeling. Dating is not supposed to be torturous. And trust me, if you’re feeling like it’s torturous, going out with you is probably a mild form of torture in and of itself. Don’t let that become you. You want to be fun and enjoy yourself. That way other people will have fun with you and enjoy their time with you!
Like I said in my last post, you have to be confident. You have to love you. You have no reason to think you’re anything less than wonderful, and think dating is a fun experience. Once you get back to that place, then, and only then, should you start dating again.