First Date? Here’s What You Should NEVER Discuss by @HindsghtisFunny

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I wrote a post on my personal blog some time ago about what not to say on a first date.  Admittedly, I break most of my own rules and have talked about {on more than one occasion} my ex-husband, writing a dating blog, my friends from the internet and a slew of other topics that I mentioned in my post.  Surprisingly, these topics have never been deal breakers and I’ve had men comment on how unscripted conversations with me are unusual on first dates.  A man recently described conversation with me as refreshing because I tend to throw caution to the wind and have fun conversations rather than typical first date ones.

That being said, there are still several topics I think should be completely off limits on a first date.  Many of these are topics were deal breakers that men have sprung on me, and thus I can imagine would apply vice versa.


  1. PoliticsNothing good ever comes from discussing politics on a first date, especially with someone like me who hates politics.  I’m all for an educated debate at a later time, but a first date is not the time to ramble on about your political views.  Chances are you will either bore your date, offend them or make yourself look like an uneducated fool (if not all three).
  2. Drinking/Drugs storiesYes, we’ve all had some wild nights, but stories about how you were so drunk that you needed to get your stomach pumped or have an entire album of blackmail photos you wish to burn isn’t going to impress anyone.  Stories about drugs are even worse.  There’s nothing about being a drunk or druggie that will make a quality person not walk out of the date.
  3. Sex StoriesIn a similar vein, we all have some crazy sex stories, but no one needs to know them on a first date.  No self-respecting person needs to talk about their life between the sheets when they first meet someone.  
  4. Impending divorce/custody battlesJust as murder trials show the best side of horrible people, divorce shows the worst side of generally good people.  This is just an opportunity for blame-laying and name calling and no date wants to see you stoop to that level.
  5. ArrestsThat one time you shoplifted a candy bar when you were 15 might be funny down the line, but if you have nothing else to discuss on a first date, it’s a deal breaker.
  6. Bodily functionsEverybody poops. It’s not pretty and should never be discussed on a first date (unless you’re into scat and are looking for a like-minded individual).  For everyone else who prefers not to be defecated on, leave the tales of going #2 on a camping trip until a later date, or never.  There’s nothing less sexy than hearing about bathroom issues on a first date.
  7. Getting pregnantIf you have children, that’s great, but I don’t want to hear about how or when or how unexpected getting pregnant was for you and your ex.  This is especially true if you talk about getting pregnant as a couple.  “We” didn’t get pregnant, either you did or she did. It’s in the past and I don’t want to hear about it on a first date.
  8. MoneyOn a first date, I don’t want to hear how much money you make, or don’t make.  I once had a man tell me about how his house was currently in foreclosure and then wondered why I didn’t want to go out again.  If you can’t afford to take her out, don’t tell her.  If you’re super rich, don’t tell her.  Dating shouldn’t be about money and is a huge turnoff.
  9. Strained Family Relationships–I know not everyone is going to have a warm and fuzzy relationship with their family, but please leave the sensitive details about why your family is estranged for another date.  I don’t need to know that your father was a Neo-Nazi who got drunk and beat your mother.
  10. Psychos You’ve DatedDating brings out some crazy stories, but a first date, when you’re trying to make a good impression, isn’t the time to tell them.  Sure, maybe you went out with some crazy person who broke all of the above rules then sent you flowers and gave you a pet name all before you even knew their last name, but keep those stories for another time.  You’ll only come off as mean and judgmental by sharing dating horror stories on a first date.


Any other things that you should NEVER discuss on a first date?

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Divorced and back on the prowl. I love country music, beef jerky and puppies. Hat's off to you if you can keep up with me! Emily is on Twitter @HindsghtisFunny and check out her blog.

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