Looking Through Your Mate’s Cell Phone, Email and Social Networking Messages by @Luvologist

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In the age of cell phones, text messaging, emails and social networking there seems to be an ‘pandemic’ going around. It’s affecting the entire world. There are a lot of people who seem to think it’s okay to go through a mate’s cell phone, email or their social networking realm. It seems to be the way people can figure out if they can catch a mate in a lie or see what’s going on in their lives if they don’t talk to them about it.

Unless it is previously discussed between the couple, it is twenty-two WRONGS to go through someone’s cell phone, email or their social networking realm. Period. End of story. It’s off-limits. There is not a valid reason for it. If your ‘intuition’ or ‘inner self’ suspects some extra-curricular activities going on, you should have a conversation or COMMUNICATE with your mate and ask for permission. This is an offense worse than going through a woman’s purse, going through a man’s pants pocket or your mate fishing around your car that YOU pay the car note. You are infringing on someone’s privacy.

Respect Their Privacy

When you go through someone’s cell phone, email, etc. whether you find something or not, the most essential part of the relationship is lost, TRUST. When you lose TRUST you lose COMMUNICATION and everything crumbles from that point.

If you go through the cell phone and find something, it results into an argument and TRUST is lost by both parties. The person who is looking through the cell phone doesn’t TRUST their mate because of what they found and the mate doesn’t TRUST the person going through the cell phone because they’re mad because their mate didn’t TRUST them.

If you find what you are looking for and you don’t leave then the relationship has a total uphill battle in regaining TRUST with both parties. By chance you do leave (which, amazingly enough, is part of the minority; even though people say they are going to leave they usually don’t go anywhere) then you probably won’t know the reason why the relationship took a turn for the worse and it won’t be corrected in the next relationship you enter.

If you go through the cell phone and you don’t find anything, you still don’t TRUST your mate but you also don’t TRUST your ‘intuition’ or ‘inner self’. So when you finally speak to your mate about your ‘intuition’ you don’t TRUST, your mate (who you don’t TRUST) looks at you funny because you don’t TRUST them, even though you didn’t find anything.

((smirking)) Did you get that?

Relationships are all about Communication and Trust

I find it highly ironic most relationship issues revolve around COMMUNICATION tools such as email, social networking and cellphones. One would think one would use these tools to enhance relationships.

BTW- For those who think because you pay the cell phone and Internet bill it gives you the right to go through their communication tools…

((shaking my head real slowly))

Reread this post because the same rule applies.

To the wanna-be detectives, try COMMUNICATING with your mate… umm, you know, TALK to them. If you feel they are lying, there are other ways in catching them in a lie. Also, if you feel they are lying… THAT’S YOUR INTUITION TALKING. Snooping around isn’t the way to go and it doesn’t solve anything.

The situation hardly ever ends up good when it happens.

Be well…

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Luvologist™ (or more commonly "Luv") has given love and relationship insight for numerous of years. Instead of using the ‘professional and coaching’ approach he uses the experiences he has witnessed and been through and uses the 'hard-knock-life' approach. He gives it straight/no chaser from a man’s point-of-view. You can also follow him on Twitter @Luvologist or connect with him on Facebook and you can check out what he writes about on Luv and Relationships.

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