When it comes down to it, most of us out there have either been cheated on or have been the cheater. As much as we want to believe that the person who lies next to us at night would never do anything like cheat on us, but it does happen.
Why The Cheating
There are actually many reasons why people cheat. As much as I hate to do this, I am going to come clean. I cheated on my ex husband and really it was not my proudest moment of my life, but it did happen. I don’t want to give excuses why it happened or say that it was okay that it happened. What I will say though is that I do not regret that it happened. It was an eye opener for me, I was very unhappy in my marriage and it got to the point that I did not even know who I was any more. I cheated with an old friend that brought happiness back into my life. He brought back beautiful memories just being around him, memories that I had forgotten. Being with him is what pushed me into therapy, which then made me realise how unhealthy my relationship with my ex husband was. I realized that I did not love him any more, that I needed to be happy again and not just for myself, but also for my little men. I wanted to show them happiness and not how to fake happiness. I know cheating on my ex was not the right thing to do, but it happened, I do not regret it because of it I am a happier person.
Cheating is a Symptom of Something Bigger
There are so many reasons people cheat, they could be like me and desperately unhappy, or, for some it is the lack of intimacy in the relationship they are in, so they go and find some one else to fill a void. Sometimes it is unexpected, a living in the moment where you meet some one you have an extreme connection to, and something happens. There is also the alcohol and drug related poor judgement cheating. And there are some out there that just do it for the thrill of cheating or just seeing if they can get away with it.
The other day I came across a quote here that seems fitting to this post:
“The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.” – Bob Marley
Deep down we all know that cheating is wrong and deep down most of use do not want to hurt those close to us. But in the end people still cheat. As much as we try to have open communication in a relationship or do special things to keep things spicy in the bedroom, cheating on one another still happens.
So what do we do when it happens?
To tell you the truth there are so many answers to the question that I have seen. I know of couples who have broken up, divorced and never looked back. I know couples that when the truth came out went to couples counseling to figure out what was the reason for it happening and work out solutions to help their marriage. I know of couples that stay together and just keep cheating on each other as a punishment to each other … sad but true.
So when cheating happens in a relationship we are all going to react differently. Is it something that will break the relationship or are you willing to stay and work though it as a couple? I guess in the end it all depends on how much you love and care for the person and how much you cherish your relationship is how the relationship will work out in the end.