Throwing in the towel…
…temporarily of course
Over the last few weeks I have been to-ing and fro-ing regarding the dating game. My last date was with James and that went well – not! Last week I said I should just go for it but there’s only so much I’m willing to do. Which isn’t that much so early on to be honest. If guys don’t want to get in touch, that’s their problem – it has nothing to do with me. [Well hardly anything]. There is no point in brooding over these things. Not interested? Move on and concentrate on yourself.
A few people have said that if I stop looking, someone will come along and sweep me off my feet. I’ve heard that’s true but after years of not looking, nothing has happened – hence why I started looking, and what I’ve found so far isn’t exactly anything to write home about.
Anyway, without babbling, I’ve decided to work on me first. Everyone is saying that to find and accept love into your life you must first love yourself. Don’t get me wrong, I do love myself and I’ve never felt so confident, sexually and physically, for my entire life but I need to focus on me. What I want. I always put other things and people first so now – I’m going to start a relationship with myself. My first ever long term relationship!
There certain aspects of my life that I need to change in order to make myself happy. New career, new lifestyle and hopefully, a new location. Until I can get that or start on that path, is there any point in inviting a man into my life only to have to put him and our relationship first? The answer to that of course is no.
So, basically I’m waving my white flag in surrender to the dating game. Not forever – I don’t want to
become a spinster with 20 cats to feed. I’m just not putting myself out there.
Don’t worry, I’m not leaving SW or not writing my blog; there’s stuff that hasn’t been written yet. I must say though. If a David Beckham lookalike spots me in the breakfast aisle searching for Weetabix in Tesco and asks me out; I’m hardly going to say no am I?
I’m just taking a break from the online shizzle – It’s mostly the same self-obsessed, I love football guys there anyway. Maybe in a few months’ time when I return, there could be some decent folk I want to date!
So… Until next time
Bella x
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